Under the weather

The past few days of non-stop activities have taken its toll on me. I've been sporting a husky voice the past week (almost). Too much Lindt chocolate and too little sleep maybe.

The usual light and bubbly Schments is on vacay today (and the past few days). A couple of reasons...

** Surfing the crimson wave. The usual excuse. Discomfort = easy irritation.

** Too much of togetherness. The family has been sleeping in the tiny bedroom inside the auxiliary house. There have been a couple of times as of late when I'm wishing (under my breath of course) for some privacy. Sometimes, for a little more independence. The feeling comes and goes. I'm getting old and I just want some ME space (sometimes less meddling).

** What comes up must come down. All the excitement and happiness these past few weeks came to an end last Sunday. Poo. Back to the grindstone.

** Disappointment. I've been feeling disappointed these past few days. Sometimes, I just want an easy "yes" when I ask for help. I think I'm pretty helpful myself, and I guess I make the mistake of expecting the same from people. I guess disappointment springs out of expectations not being met. When I'm disappointed, especially at people who I expect a lot from, my instant reaction is frustration. I don't want to be angry. It ain't healthy. Some people are just built a certain way.

** "It shouldn't have to be an up hill battle," my wise friends had said last Saturday. There's always room for improvement for everyone. But then, when they do improve, they're still essentially the same person. Improving yourself (and the relationship) should not have to be difficult. If it is, then you might want to rethink it.

** So close, but no cigar. The hard part is letting it all go.

I prolly need a fresh perspective. Maybe set goals for myself and really work my way towards them.